


Until Death

by spacedaydreamer



Series: The Terrorist [2]
Category: Zero Escape (Video Games), Zero Escape: Zero Time Dilemma - Fandom
Genre: (no actual non-con but it does get uncomfortable so heads up), Death, Gen, Major character death - Freeform, Murder, Psychological Trauma, Strangulation, Suicide, fantasizing about being killed? not sure what to tag that bit as, mental trauma, non-con elements, so this is the bad ending nobody asked for, some reference to alcoholism
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-10-06
Updated: 2017-10-06
Packaged: 2019-01-09 21:47:04
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,005
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12285006
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/spacedaydreamer/pseuds/spacedaydreamer
Summary: He'd always had a feeling in the back of his mind that recovery was impossible, but it had finally just solidified itself as fact in Junpei's mind. In the end, there was only one option for him: he had to die. The only question was how...





	Until Death

 

" _No!_ ” Akane’s shout echoed through the control room, Sigma not moving an inch as she screamed at him. “There _has_ to be a way! _We can’t give up on him!_ ”

“Akane, it’s been five years. He’s relapsed countless times, and each time he recovers he lasts half as long until the next.”

“But- that’s- We just haven’t found the right way to help him yet! That _has_ to be it!”

“Akane, face the facts. Junpei is beyond saving.”

Her hands tightened into fists, and she glared at Sigma. That _had_ to be false- she _refused_ to believe that there was no way to save him.

“No, Sigma. That’s impossible.”

“Is it really, Akane?”

“Yes, it is! There has to be a timeline where he recovered- I _know_ it exists!”

“How are you going to reach it, then? I sure hope you don’t intend to _die_ to reach it, because that’d destroy whatever little shards of him were left.”

“Of _course_ not! I’m not an idiot, Sigma.” Akane was growing frustrated. She _knew_ that Junpei could be saved. He _had_ to be saved. “We just haven’t tried everything yet.”

“What else is there to try?”

“There’s- that’s-“

“We’ve run out of options, Akane. You _can’t_ save h-“

Sigma’s voice cut off when Akane slapped him, fury burning in her eyes. He opened his mouth for a moment, as if he intended to say something more- but clearly, he thought better of it.

“I can save him, Sigma. I know I can. I _have_ to, because it’s my fault. If he’d never loved me, then Delta couldn’t have done this to him. He couldn’t have broken him like this.” A part of her knew that wasn’t really true- if it wasn’t her, then it would be somebody else. Junpei’s fixation with her was simply a by-product of what he’d been through, not the cause of it. “He saved my life, and I repaid him by allowing him to turn into this. His ‘ _reward_ ’ was to be tortured for months on end, until he forgot everything about himself. How could I _possibly_ give up on him? I _can’t_ , Sigma. That’s impossible.”

“….fine. But, you have to remember. You promised him.”

“….I _know_. I know…” Akane wished she hadn’t. “I just… I don’t want to give up, until we’ve expended every possible option.”

“Akane… we _have_.”

She couldn’t respond. She hated this, she hated it more than anything. She knew it was true, she knew that they were out of options, but she just couldn’t do it. She couldn’t kill Junpei. She couldn’t allow him to turn back into what he’d been, she couldn’t allow him to end the world again, but she couldn’t bring herself to hurt him. Junpei was too important to her, he was the person she loved the most in the world. How could she possibly kill him? Even after everything he’d been through, he was still Junpei.

…right?

She hoped so. She truly, sincerely hoped so.

* * *

 

Junpei was sitting in his room, staring at the ceiling. He didn’t know how much time had gone by, but he could feel himself slipping. Again.

He didn’t want to do this, but he didn’t have a choice. He was going to lose it for _real_ , sooner or later. Eventually he’d run out of second chances, and they wouldn’t be able to call him back anymore.

And, seeing as that was sure to happen… he’d rather die as him. It was unfair. It was cruel. But Kanny wouldn’t kill him. She’d refused to kill him, and she’d removed any possible thing that could be used for suicide, so he didn’t have any options left but to figure out how to force her hand.

His eyes traced invisible patterns around the ceiling, and he found himself daydreaming. He thought of Kanny, with her hands around his neck. He could feel the weight of her body on his chest, he could see the tears streaming down her face as she squeezed the life out of him, he could feel his throat constrict as she whispered her final apology. It was… wonderful. So _intimate_ , so _wonderful_. Dying with her hands around his neck would be perfectly _ideal_ \- he wanted it. He _longed_ for it. But, he didn’t know how to make it happen.

The image in his mind shifted, this time to Kanny, with a knife to his throat. She’d pinned him to the ground, her knees dug painfully into his chest, and he could feel the cold steel beginning to split skin. Her tears fell onto his face, but he only smiled- she looked beautiful. She was _so beautiful_ , and he was _so happy_ that it was her. He wanted to say something but she pressed the knife down harder, and he felt the blood begin to flow.

He blinked, and this time it was something else. She’d pressed him hard against a wall, a gun held up to his chin as she stared into his eyes. She looked so _sad_ , but Junpei knew she was doing the right thing. Besides, the way she’d pressed her body up against his was… enticing. Wonderful. He _loved_ being so _close_ to her, _especially_ because she was going to kill him. He had only one free hand, but he used it to slowly, gently cup Kanny’s face- and then she pulled the trigger.

He went on like that for hours, imagining Akane killing him _over_ and _over_. He couldn’t stop- he _loved_ it. He _needed_ it. Before he lost himself, before he snapped for good, he could experience the most intimate possible connection that existed between two people.

What he simply wouldn’t give for her to kill him for real…

* * *

 

Sigma watched the monitors in the control room alone, with narrowed eyes. Junpei and Akane were eating lunch, but Sigma _knew_ something was up with Junpei. He’d been too calm, too happy- Sigma had seen this before. It happened every single time he was about to relapse. He got calmer, he acted good and healthy, and then within a few days he was tearing his arms open and screaming again.

He’d tried to warn Akane, of course, but she wouldn’t listen to him. Sigma’d already known that she wouldn’t, but he still had to _try_. He was just one person, and he was _hardly_ the type of person to fix a fucked-up situation like this, but he couldn’t sit back while she drove herself slowly insane.

He knew that she wasn’t even aware of it, but she’d become just as dependent on Junpei as he was on her. She got agitated whenever anyone else went to check up on him, and she’d spend hours on end just watching him. Any time Sigma brought up his lack of progress she would _insist_ that they only needed to wait a little longer, and then refuse to listen to his arguments any longer. It simply just wasn’t healthy.

And in the end, there were really only two outcomes that Sigma could see happening- either Junpei would die, or they would have to be separated.

Sigma hated both options. Despite everything, he didn’t _want_ to kill Junpei. He didn’t _want_ to render everything they’d done for him over these years completely pointless, but there was little in terms of other choice. Junpei was a danger both to himself, and to everyone around him. When you took into account the fact that he’d built up a little bit of strength in the time they’d been watching him, it was fully possible that he really could pose a threat to someone- and the person most at risk was Akane herself.

That was technically grounds enough to separate the two, but he knew it wasn’t that simple. If he had them separated; then Akane would resent him, and it would likely be the last straw needed to make Junpei snap for good. If that were to happen, then they’d again have no choice but to kill him.

Given the choices, he’d rather it be _him_ that killed Junpei, but he knew that _also_ wouldn’t work. Doing so would destroy any trust that Akane had in him, and potentially ruin her already delicate psyche. If he let _Akane_ kill him though, that could just as easily destroy her. She didn’t _want_ to kill him, and nothing short of Junpei attempting to murder her was likely going to get her to change her mind. And if Junpei actually tried to kill her, then… Sigma wondered if Akane would be able to handle it.

In the end, this was a situation with no winners. They all lost, regardless of the outcome.

* * *

 

“ _ahahahaaaa! HAHAHAA!_ ”

Junpei was practically shrieking with laughter, his entire body shaking with insanity. It was beautiful. So beautiful, that it hurt. He’d figured out how to get Kanny to kill him, and the irony to it had been enough to make him snap.

After all, that’s all he really needed to do.

“Junpei? Junpei, are you alright?!”

She’d burst into his room, but Junpei didn’t bother turning to look. He could see her concerned face in his mind’s eye, and he _loved_ it- he knew that she cared. He knew that she cared, that she loved him, and that soon, she’d kill him. Akane Kurashiki, the woman he loved enough to end the world for, was going to kill him.

“I’m fine, Kanny. I’m perfectly fine.”

He let himself stop laughing, but the grin never left his face. She was walking towards him- perfect. He wanted to be close to her, he wanted to hold her, to have her, to prove that she was _his_ , for one last time before he died. Before she made him eternally and forever _hers_.

“Why… why aren’t you looking at me? Junpei?” He didn’t respond, and it drew her closer. Good. _Good_. The grin got a little bit wider with each step she took, his ears straining to make out the sounds of her breath. “Junpei please, you’re starting to scare me. Look at me.”

She was close enough now- Junpei did as she asked, revealing the mask of pure insanity on his face. Kanny gasped and turned, but it was too late- Junpei grabbed onto her wrist with the strength he’d regained over the time he’d been stuck here, and pushed her to the floor.

“Kanny. Kanny, we’re going to be together. I promise, we’ll be together. Doesn’t that make you happy? Aren’t you happy, Kanny? We’ll be together!”

He only pinned one of her arms, not caring enough to restrain her fully. Restraining her was the exact _opposite_ of what he really wanted- he wanted _her_ to be restraining _him_. But, all in good time. For now, he’d simply take in everything that he could, every sight and scent and sound of Kanny that he could hold onto once he died.

“J-Junpei! _Stop this!_ ”

Desperation shone in her eyes, but Junpei didn’t let it bother him. If she was desperate, then she’d be all the more willing to kill him. It was… beautiful… He used his free hand to trace a line down her jaw, ignoring how she shook her head and wriggled beneath him, before it went to her neck.

Her neck was delicate and thin, and just as beautiful as the rest of her. Her skin was soft and smooth, with beads of perspiration beginning to form on her face as he started to squeeze. Her eyes bugged out and he could see that she was _finally_ panicking.

“Kanny, I love you. I love you so much. You’re so beautiful. So, you’ll do this for me, right? You’ll let me have this?”

He smiled and pressed his lips onto hers, stealing away some of her breath. Her free hand flailed at the one that was strangling her, and her legs kicked wildly- until one knee finally connected with Junpei’s gut, forcing him to pull back. It was a harsh end to the kiss, and left him distracted for just a moment.

One moment was all Kanny needed, and she’d switched their positions without any real effort. Her breathing shook and Junpei could see the beginnings of a bruise forming- perfect. He’d left his mark. The mark that was _his_ , that _nobody else_ could leave on her. She’d remember him.

Forever.

The grin never left his face, not as Kanny started to choke the life from him. Not when her breathing steadied and she started to realize what she was doing, and not when she started to cry, as she squeezed his neck harder to cut off what little air intake he’d had.

He’d been right. He’d been completely and utterly _right_.

Kanny’s face as she killed him truly was beautiful…

He could no longer breathe, and his vision had begun to grow blurry, but the grin still didn’t leave his face. This was perfect. This was the ending he _wanted_. This was the _best possible ending_ , right? There was nothing else for him. Nothing that could turn out better than a world where he was being killed by the woman he adored.

Junpei died with his eyes open, slowly mouthing the words ‘ _I love you_ ’ while smiling like an excited child with Akane’s hands around his neck.

* * *

 

“J-Junpei…. Junpei…. _Junpei!!_ ”

Whatever semblance of sanity that Akane’d had left was gone. It had died with Junpei, as she choked the breath out of him- or perhaps, it had died the second he’d tried to kill her. Regardless, Akane Kurashiki was already gone.

Junpei’s body was warm, and he looked _happy_ \- so _happy_. He’d told her that he loved her, even as he was dying. He’d told her that he loved her, while she _murdered_ him. The tears wouldn’t stop flowing, as she picked up his body and held it close. She’d killed Junpei. She’d killed him. He’d broken because of her, and instead of fixing him, she’d _killed_ him.

“Akane? Akane-- _!_ ”

Sigma ran in through the open door, but Akane didn’t bother to look for his reaction. It didn’t matter. Nothing mattered. _She’d killed Junpei_. The bruise on her neck hurt, it hurt to breathe, but she didn’t care- Junpei had given it to her. He’d tried to give her a gift, before he died. It, and his kiss, were the last things he’d ever be able to give her.

_“Once I get this one looked at, we can match.”_

She’d told him that, once. He’d just wanted to match with her. The scars on their hands, and the bruises on their necks… they’d match…

Akane could hear Sigma speaking to her, but she didn’t respond. She only had one option. There was only one option open to her, after murdering Junpei. She had to match him, completely. They had to match. They would match, soon.

“I’m sorry Junpei… I’m so, so sorry…” Her voice went silent, and she whispered into his ear. “I’ll be there soon. I promise. Wait for me, please.”

* * *

 

Sigma found himself crying, for the first time in what felt like centuries. He should’ve known. He should’ve expected this. He could have _stopped_ this, if he’d just been a little faster.

However, sometimes, you simply just aren’t fast enough.

It was Aoi who’d told him the news about Akane, and how he’d found her in her room with a noose around her neck. Sigma had gone over and found him half a bottle deep in some sort of alcohol, and promptly joined in.

“I’m sorry. I could have stopped her. If I’d just stopped her from killing him, I could’ve saved her.”

“…”

“I don’t blame you for hating me. I don’t blame you at all.”

“……”

“Is that why you called me over?’

“………no. I _want_ to kill you, but you’re not allowed to die. No one else. Nobody else, or we’ll all end up dead.”

“…… that’s fair. Alright then, I won’t die.” Sigma took a drink, wincing at the burn of alcohol. It was familiar, but some things never changed regardless. He looked away from Aoi, not wanting to see his face anymore- it was hollow and empty, much like Sigma was certain his own face looked. “I’m sorry you had to find her.”

“Better me than someone else.”

“What are you going to do now?”

“Keep working. That’s what she did, whenever he’d died.”

“…?”

“In the timelines where she didn’t know. In the ones where he’d died to get her out.”

“Oh.”

They went silent again, neither of them talking any more after that. Sigma didn’t say anything when Diana swung by to pick him up, staying silent for the car ride back to their apartment, and only staring at the ceiling once he made it to their bedroom.

He felt like he needed to die, but it was out of the question. Not even because of what Aoi had said, but purely because of who he was.

Sigma Klim was not allowed to die.

Even on a timeline as damned as this, he had to live. Not for _himself_ , but as punishment for the people he’d let die. He’d remember, and he’d spend the rest of his cursed quantum immortality remembering.

He’d once thought of his abilities as something helpful. They were ‘insurance’ in case a plan went wrong, or a certainty that _somewhere_ , he’d be able to find a better timeline. If he worked long enough and hard enough, he could find a better timeline.

Time had proven him wrong. There was nothing good about remembering time after time where everyone you loved died. There was nothing helpful about knowing your near-infinite amount of failures. Perhaps the only reason he hadn’t ended up like Akane was simply because he was older- even if his body was young, his mind had seen plenty. He’d just grown numb to it over the years, to a point where not even _this_ truly phased him.

Did it _hurt_ him? Yes, of course. However, that really didn’t matter in the end.

 After all, Sigma Klim was _never_ allowed to die.

**Author's Note:**

> In the first of three potential endings I've been working on for a while, is this one- the 'bad ending', of sorts. Real recovery would be difficult for Junpei in the position where he is, and while not every timeline would end up this bad, there'll be plenty that certainly aren't good. This is just picking one of those many, many timelines that exist. 
> 
> Thank you for reading! The next two will be going up soon, either tonight or tomorrow- please look forwards to them!


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